Dear Maserati
Dear John (ahem) Maserati,
Dear Maserati
Dear John (ahem) Maserati,
He’s German, from Stuttgart.
I’m sure you can already guess what this letter is about. You always told me to shoot straight and don’t beat around the bush. You say, “**Excellence through passion****.”** So, here’s me shooting straight. Being passionate.
I have met somebody else. He’s better than you, faster, stronger, more reliable. He electrifies me. He takes me swing dancing through the curves, and we rally-race across the desert. He’s never left me stranded because of an electrical problem. His friends - the ones that introduced me to him - aren’t jerks and I’m genuinely happy when I’m with him. He’s German, from Stuttgart. A real stallion. I like stallions. Isn’t your brother a stallion?
Isn’t your brother a stallion?
Please don’t misunderstand. You are very handsome, and I fell in love with your Italian design and baritone voice, but you’re superficial. Everything inside of you is empty, hollow, dark and so…Dodge-y. You are a bottomless pit of self-loathing, despair and rehash. I can’t be with someone who tears me down or falls apart the way you do.
So, I thought it was only fair that I let you know I’ve met someone else. I don’t know what the future holds, but I don’t see you in it. I am returning your pitchfork and taking down your posters. I know you’ll meet someone special someday, but it won’t be me. Please know that I never meant to hurt you, and please don’t hate me. It’s Sildenafil you need, not Stellantis. Have a good life.
Take care of yourself,
ModernChassis
P.S.
Nettuno being “100% new. 100% Maserati.”, is ‘100% a stretch of the truth’. You know it. I know it. Stop fooling yourself. You’re better than that. The Penguin? Sadly, prophetic.
- ModernChassis Team
Writing Credits:
JustCleo
Alex The Howard
#ModernChassis #ZeroEmissions #Maserati #MaseratiUSA #Porsche #Ferrari #TheBatman #Stellantis #Dodge #ThePenguin #Nettuno #Sildenafil #TiffanyAndCo
Read **A Brief History Of Maserati**** here!**
References
https://www.roadandtrack.com/new-cars/car-technology/a33078911/maserati-nettuno-v6-part-sharing/
https://www.motor1.com/news/432142/maserati-nettuno-not-all-new/
https://www.maserati.com/us/en
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stellantis